I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
