she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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