I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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