the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
