1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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