exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize