She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
