You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
