Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Randomize
