I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
