Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
