You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
