And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I party with great urgency now.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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