Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You're breaking my sexual little heart
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
