I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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