Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
