AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize