Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
This baby is an asshole
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
