you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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