Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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