If i could tip my vagina, i would.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
