Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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