he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
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I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
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Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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