he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
