Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
