Only a mothe r could love this liver
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
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