what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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