Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize