i think my tv is drunk
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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