She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
