i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
