did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
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Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
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I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
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