I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
