oh god the rape fog is back!
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize