I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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