We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
