I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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