Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
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They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
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Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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