I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
she looked like the before picture.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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