Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
it hurts more in the daytime
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
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i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
My ass is underappreciated
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
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