And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
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I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
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i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.