ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself