non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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