literally had 100 drinks last night.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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