Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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