I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
