No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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