Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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