Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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