I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
