im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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